In Memory

Mary Perciballi

Mary Perciballi



 
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07/04/12 10:02 PM #1    

Judy Johnson (Fowler)

I wished you could have known how loved you were ... I wish you could have called someone and changed things ... Part of my heart died when you died ... You were a good person and fun to talk to when we were young ... Miss you ... Judy


06/28/18 04:15 PM #2    

Jayne Loader

Mary was one of my closest friends from first to sixth grade. After that, we drifted apart.

When we were in sixth grade, her mother turned to my mother and said, "I wish we could trade daughters!"  What a horrible thing to say. (If Mary's mother spoke to her like that in public, imagine what she must have said to her in private.)  My mother tried to laugh it off by saying that she wished they could trade daughters, too--which might have actually been true!  The ostensible subject of the conversation was that I loved dressing up in pretty clothes (like Mrs. Perciballi) while Mary was a tomboy (like my mother).

I wish Mary's parents, when they became so incredibly rich, had sent her to a good girls' boarding school instead of yanking her out of Paschal and dumping her in Eastern Hills, where she was alone and friendless.  I wish they had gotten her some serious professional help.  She was so unhappy and her parents were so dissatisfied with her, it was no wonder she started acting out. I tried to help by rushing her for Kala, but my sisters did not agree--just another failure, which made everything worse.

It broke my heart when Mary took her own life, though I really wasn't all that surprised.


06/28/18 07:23 PM #3    

Patti Lawrence (Crabtree)

Jayne, 

Why would you leave this kind of childhood memory or tribute? Rather sad and disgusting words if Mary leaves behind family that needs to heal. I buried my husband of 40 years last week so I know about grieving and what the healing process is. You should be compassionate and considerate - this is not for social media. And yes, that's what this platform is.

Kindly, 

Patti Lawrence Crabtree 


06/28/18 11:07 PM #4    

Judy Johnson (Fowler)

I really enjoyed my friendship with Mary ... I also knew Jayne ... She had different friends than me but I knew her all the way back to Daggett ... Out of all the students that went to Paschal; that really large school; I don't remember all that many by name ... It has been almost 50 years ... I do remember that Jayne did not have a mean bone in her body ... I don't think she meant what she wrote the way you took it ... 

If you are reading this and you find yourself unhappy please reach out to someone ... Mary somehow did not know how important she was to the people that knew her ... Maybe like me they got busy with their own family and moved away, but I often thought of her and others ... Find new friends, we all need friends ...

Another way to be happy is to get a pet too ... Something that really needs you ... Ours this time around are hard to place rescues with issues ... That means we have a purpose and also have to  walk them everyday ... Helps me with my bad knees to keep moving ... I have so much power, all I have to do is say "Who" and the dogs start dancing ... I don't have to say "Who wants to go for a walk?"  That makes us smile every time ... (hint a good pooper scooper is a Taco Bell cup ... our Taco Bell give seniors; that's us; a free drink ... when we walk i also pick up old nails or screws in the road and put them in the cup using the lids' straw hole ... the poop and nails can go in the trash and won't poke the garbage collector ... REMEMBER the Taco Bell across the street from the tennis courts) ...

Hope all of you are keeping cool ... Judy

 

 


06/29/18 10:02 AM #5    

Jayne Loader

Patti--Before I wrote about Mary, I did my due diligence and learned that both her parents and older half-brothers are dead.  Mary never married and never had children.  She died in 1971 and there is no family left to mourn her. If Judy, her closest friend, was not offended by what I wrote (thank you, Judy) then I don't see why you should be.  Are there rules for what is appropriate on this website?   Is it OK to mention that someone died of cancer, but not that they died by their own hand?   Are we only supposed to write happy memories, never sad ones?   

In Mary's case, the manner of her death was never any secret.   The whole story was published in the Star-Telegram, with a lot more detail than I posted here.   I thought people might be interested why Mary died.


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